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my sister gave me
her new phone number the other day
but i’m pretty lazy
so i just keep using the old number instead
the woman who has that number now
is my new sister
and we talk every day
luckily they’re both named stephanie
so i didn’t even have to change
her contact information in my phone
but anyway while i was
on the phone with stephanie
she said that she just started doing yoga
and she feels better than ever
she said i should try doing it too
and i never used to take advice from
my old sister but this time i thought
"new sister, new me"
but when i tried yoga
i pulled a muscle in my back
it was the worst pain i’ve ever felt
in my entire life
so i tried to call my doctor
but the number must have changed
because some guy
answered the phone instead
i said “can you recommend something
for excruciating back pain?”
and he said “i think you have the wrong number”
i said “listen, you’re my new doctor now and i need your help.
what can i do to make my back stop hurting?”
he said
“i don’t know, have you tried doing yoga?”
i was desperate for relief
so i tried it again
and this time the pain went away instantly
it was incredible
so i called my new sister
i said “guess what? i did yoga”
she said “that’s great. how do you feel?”
so i thought about it
and i said
“actually i feel about the same as before”
what a waste of time