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i have a friend who’s such a compulsive liar
that not even this is true
i like to take placebos recreationally
i’m do enjoy everything in moderation
but only sometimes
i like to refer to real grass
as artificial astroturf
i’m starting a solitaire league
so please do not apply
i used to be addicted to
having interventions
but my friends and family
didn’t know what to do about it
no one ever said anything
so i had to quit cold turkey
i once said
and i quote
“i’m paraphrasing right now”
wait was that it?
well it was something
along those lines anyway
